Archive for the ‘politics’ Category

Good news and bad news in Baghdad

Saddam Hussein’s 7 doubles were hastily rounded up at an undisclosed site in Baghdad and informed, “Gentlemen

The 3 Women Golfers!!!

One Day there were 3 women golfing when 1 of the womens balls flew into the woods. The woman went to get it but when she did she saw a frog who was trapped. The Frog said “Release me and i will grant you 3 wishes.”” So the lady released the frog and the frog [...]

Bin laden, sadam hussane and a camel

bin laden, sadam hussane were sitting in a cave thinking of ways to bomb the U.S.A. and bin laden had his camel with him. A man walks in lifts up the camels tail then walks out, then another man walks in lifts up the camels tail then walks out. Sadam is looking a bit puzzled [...]

Aliens Attack

President Dubya was awakened one night by an urgent call from the Pentagon. “Mr. President

A White House Christmas

Twas the night before Christmas and throughout the White House, Al Gore was eyeing Hillary, peering into her blouse. The Secret Service were guarding the premises with care, for a whole host of Democrats were vacationing there. Chelsea was nestled all snug in her bed, Dirty thoughts swam around Mr. Kennedy’s head. And Bill in [...]

Politically Correct Terms of Endearment

One Who is PC — target One Who is Not PC — target Ontologically-Challenged — fictional or mythological The absolute root of all evil known Osmotically-Challenged — Thirsty Other-Aged — too old/young (dual purpose) Outdoor Urban Dwellers — homeless People of Height — too tall Person of Region — redneck Persons Living With Entropy — [...]

Clinton Limerick

Said Bill Clinton to young Ms. Lewinsky We don’t want to leave clues like Kaczynski, Since you look such a mess, Use the hem of your dress And wipe that stuff off of your chinsky.

Unexpectedly, the first to score

Unexpectedly, the first to score in the Super Bowl was Bill Clinton.

Asking the Wizard of Oz

President Bush, Dan Quayle, Ross Perot, and Bill Clinton all traveled together to see the Wizard of Oz. Upon arrival, they were brought to see him.First, President Bush went to see the Wizard and said, “Everyone says I have no compassion or feelings, I wish to have a Heart”. So the Wizard said, “So be [...]

Ruqsian Couple

A Russian couple was walking down the street in Moscow one night, when the man felt a drop hit his nose. “I think it’s raining”, he said to his wife. “No, that felt more like snow to me”, she replied. “No, I’m sure it was just rain, he said”. Well, as these things go, they [...]

Pro and con

If pro is the opposite of con, then what’s the opposite of congress? PROGRESS!

First Day in Prison

Jerry was sent to prison and placed in a cell with a huge, burly guy. When lights-out occurred, the big guy got out of his bunk and said to Jerry,”We’re going to have sex! You want to be the Mommie or the Daddie?” A very terrified Jerry replied, “Uh, well, I guess I’ll be the [...]

A Visit With The Queen

President Clinton was to represent the United States of America on a highly formal, orchestrated “state visit” to Great Britain. Air Force One stopped at a bright red carpet along which the President strode to join Queen Elizabeth II in a beautiful, ornate 17th-century coach hitched to 6 enormous matched white horses. The coach proceeded [...]

Re-election campaign

Which president married a woman who hadn’t yet divorced her first husband, and was branded an “adulterer” during his re-election campaign? Andrew Jackson

The Clinton Years

After much arguing and deliberation, historians have come up with a phrase to describe the Clinton Era. It will be called SEX BETWEEN THE BUSHES.

Question and answer Clinton joke

Q: What’s the best job a dumb blonde ever had?A: Vice-president of the United States.

Clinton in Oz!

The last four U.S. Presidents are caught in a tornado in Kansas, and off they spin to the Land of OZ. After threatening trials and tribulations, they finally make it to the Emerald City and come before the Great Wizard. “WHAT BRINGS YOU BEFORE THE GREAT WIZARD? WHAT DO YOU WANT?” Jimmy Carter steps forward [...]

Taiwan Newspaper Article

In a heroic dogfight fought over International waters off the mainland-China coast, a 60′s-era American-built Lockheed Electra propeller airliner, with 24 US Navy passenger/observers aboard, chewed up one of China’s finest sate-of-the-art supersonic fighter aircraft. The Americans, utilizing the infrequently recorded combat tactic of straight and level flight, often accomplished by relying solely on autopilot, [...]

Clinton’s Son

What happened to Chelsea Clinton’s younger brother? Monica swallowed him!

How Taxes Work…

This is a VERY simple way to understand the tax laws. Read on — it does make you think!! Let’s put tax cuts in terms everyone can understand. Suppose that every day, ten men go out for dinner. The bill for all ten comes to $100. If they paid their bill the way we pay [...]

Chicken

George Bush is so cocky, he’s like a chicken on viagra.

Bill’s Death

Did You her Bill Cliton tried to kill himself? Yea he try to O.D. on Viagra and beat himself to death!

Compulsive worrier

Tom had been a compulsive worrier for years until he found a way to overcome this problem. his friends noticed the dramatic change. “what happened?” asked doug. “you don’t seem to be worried about anything anymore.” “i hired a professional worrier for $1000 a week.” tom replied. “i haven’t had a single qualm since.” “a [...]

Clinton�s testimony by dry Seuss

I did not do it in a car I did not do it in a bar I did not do it in the dark I did not do it in the park I did not do it on a date I did not ever fornicate I did not do it at a dance I did [...]

The Top 13 Quotes From the Iraqi Minister of Information (Part I)

13> “The capitalist American government has caused us such great distress with their lies and two-faced infidel behavior that our military is unable to locate my pants.” 12> “Regarding our new French friends, I must admit that the Zionist dog, Jerry Lewis, is indeed the greatest comic genius of all times.” 11> “As American satellite [...]