Archive for the ‘asian’ Category

Confucius Says

Man who stand on toilet high on pot. It is good for girl to meet boy in park, but better for boy to park meat in girl. Man who jizz in cash register come into money. Man who drop watch in toilet have shitty time. Man who fart in church must sit in own pew. [...]

Chinese naming system

How do Chinese parents decide on a name for their newborn? Throw a quarter in the garbage disposal. Ching Chong Chin Chang

Chinese Proverbs

…Man who run in front of car get tired. …Man who run behind car get exhausted. …War doesn’t determine who’s right. War determines who’s left. …Man who tell one too many lightbulb jokes get burned out. …Man who drive like hell bound to get there. …Man who sit in tack get point. …Man who lives [...]

Osma Bin Laden

Osama bin Laden and one of his followers were riding on a camel when they stopped at a small town. Bin Laden gets off the camel and lifts up its tail and looks at the camel’s butt, just then a guy comes over and says, “What are you doing?” Osama replies, “About 2 miles back [...]

More Mis-Translations

The following are items found overseas in which people have made inappropriate use of English words for various products, and bizzare menu items in resturants. Menu Items Cold shredded children and sea blubber in spicy sauce – China Indonesian Nazi Goreng – Hong Kong Muscles Of Marines/Lobster Thermos – Cairo Prawn cock and tail – [...]

Foreign Exchange Rates

A tourist from China was traveling to New York City for a two week vacation. He went to the bank as soon as he arrived in order to exchange his Chinese money for American money. He gave the teller 1000 yuan, and the teller in turn gave him 150 dollars. A week went by, and [...]


(U gotta do a chinese accent for the chinese man.) This chinese man asks this guy what he does for a living. The guy says, ‘I’m a comedian.’ The Chinese guy says ‘No, u no, Camedien!’. The guy says, ‘Yer, I am, honest.’ The Chinese guy says, ‘No, you’re not, pwroove it, change colwor!’ (He [...]

Bush and Bin Laden

Bush was in Afghanistan on a visit, talking to Osama Bin Laden. Osama would ask Bush questions, and when Bush gave a response Bin Laden didn’t like, he pressed a button, and a giant boxing glove would hit Bush in the face. When Osama came to America, he and Bush were talking. When Osama said [...]