Bathroom rhymes and graffiti (Part 8)

-= bathroom rhymes and graffiti =-= 160
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Life is like a shit sandwich.
The more bread you have, the less shit you have to eat.

Found on the men’s room wall at Cogan’s in Norfolk, VA.

-= bathroom rhymes and graffiti =-= 161
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This is a teepee for your peepee
Not a wigwam to beat your tomtom!

-= bathroom rhymes and graffiti =-= 162
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(written above a urinal)

Why are you looking up here?
Are you ashamed of it?

-= bathroom rhymes and graffiti =-= 163
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No matter how you shake and dance,
The last drop always falls in the pants.

-= bathroom rhymes and graffiti =-= 164
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No matter how much you shake your peg,
The last wee drop runs down your leg.

-= bathroom rhymes and graffiti =-= 165
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Be like daddy, not like sis
lift the lid to take a piss.

-= bathroom rhymes and graffiti =-= 166
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Some people come here to take a shit,
I come here to leave one.

-= bathroom rhymes and graffiti =-= 167
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Don’t look now!
you’re pissing on your neighbors foot!

-= bathroom rhymes and graffiti =-= 168
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(from the late Clark Gable)

Why should I be proud of something where:
Every monkey is my equal,
and every jackass is my superior?

-= bathroom rhymes and graffiti =-= 169
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On the ceiling above the toilet:

Out to lunch, be back soon.

-= bathroom rhymes and graffiti =-= 170
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Written above a urinal in a men’s clothing store:

To curtail shoplifting of our overpriced merchandise, these urinal stalls
may be monitored at any time by buxom voluptuous airline stewardesses and
horny divorcees moonlighting as security guards.

Written below that:

If you’re longer than 12 inches, you get a 50% discount on our overpriced
suits.

And written below that:

And if you’re last name is Bobbitt, you get another half off! Prices
slashed!

And yet written below that:

Gee, I don’t see how you guys sit on these funny-shaped toilets. I can’t
seem to stay on without slipping off. Mary.

And yet written below that:

I bet that’s what your husband says too every night!

-= bathroom rhymes and graffiti =-= 171
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Please do not bite the woodwork while straining.

-= bathroom rhymes and graffiti =-= 172
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Why do turds taper?
To prevent your ass from snapping shut with a bang.

-= bathroom rhymes and graffiti =-= 173
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Written at the bottom of the toilet stall:

Beware of gay limbo dancers!

-= bathroom rhymes and graffiti =-= 174
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Alas poor Yorlik, I knew him backwards.

-= bathroom rhymes and graffiti =-= 175
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What ever happened to the good old days when men were men and pansies were
flowers?

-= bathroom rhymes and graffiti =-= 176
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I used to think I was a werewolf but I’m alright nooowwwoooooooo…

-= bathroom rhymes and graffiti =-= 177
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Phys204: a waste of time, space, and energy.

-= bathroom rhymes and graffiti =-= 178
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Sometimes I wish I was
What I was when
I wished I was
What I am now.

-= bathroom rhymes and graffiti =-= 179
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If you are taking a Shit
Please put it back

-= bathroom rhymes and graffiti =-= 180
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Q: Quel est la difference entre un homme et une femme?
A: La difference entre.

-= bathroom rhymes and graffiti =-= 181
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(written above a urinal)

I think, therefore I aim.

-= bathroom rhymes and graffiti =-= 182
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Seen above a urinal:

Si quieres crecer fuerte y sano,
comete lo que tienes en la mano.

-= bathroom rhymes and graffiti =-= 183
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Seen above a urinal:

If you think I’m sick, look at what you’re holding!

-= bathroom rhymes and graffiti =-= 184
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Virginity is like a bubble in the mainstream of life:
one prick and it’s gone forever!

-= bathroom rhymes and graffiti =-= 185
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Written above a roll of toilet paper:

UCLA diplomas, take one.

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